Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
