We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
