He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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