someone owes me an orgasm
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
