why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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