He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
