Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
