.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
