Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
