dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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