Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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