shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
