New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
