sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Randomize
