There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
We talked him into tasing himself.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
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