A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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