Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
