there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
