I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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