Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
