Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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