nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
