i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
