Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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