I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
