i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Randomize
