if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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