Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
