Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
