I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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