: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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