drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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