She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
