This is not my ceiling
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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