its not stalking. its research.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
