i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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