Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
