is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
no you cant smoke seaweed
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
