yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
