Taylor Swift is so right about you.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
