We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
