so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
