no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
