i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
