There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
