Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i just made my gag reflex go away.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
The air taste purple.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
