Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
