Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
