miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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