I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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