Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
