she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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